First thing’s first – let me define “working mom” here — I work full-time outside of the home and my spouse is a stay-at-home (yes, working) dad. This post, and my vacation last week, comes from that point of view- perhaps some of you will relate…
A much-needed vacation is always appreciated, no matter if it is the economic-crunched staycation that is all the buzz or the if it is the exotic vacation dreams are made of – time off and a change from the daily routine is always nice. My vacation last week was great but I had a little perspective shift – maybe you could call it a deeper appreciation for the mundane, almost chore-like tasks a stay-at-home parent might deal with on a daily basis.
This shift took place early in my vacation week. I remember the actual moment that colored the rest of my week- it was smack dab in the middle of one of B’s “for-the-record-books” tantrums. Specificially- while I carried her screaming (she was screaming, not me) off the beach, slip-sliding everywhere (because we were both covered in sunscreen), delicately handling a full swim diaper (just like a sponge full of water- don’t squeeze that thing unless you want stuff to come out!), my arms full of beach supplies all while I was wearing an apparently not tight enough bathing suit top (no more details here) – that’s when it hit me. It’s TUESDAY at 1:48pm and I get to deal with this. Normally I’d be sitting at my desk at work. I actually relished in the sympathetic smiles and stares I got because here I was, on a work day, dealing with my daughter’s tantrum.
This thought came time and time again over the week - as I got to take the kids on a spontaneous bike ride after lunch on Wednesday or change my 4th poopy diaper before noon on Thursday or give Jagger and B some candy at 10am on Friday as their “dessert” after breakfast. All stuff I would normally have to relinguish to my husband during the week. Maybe I was so happy just to be with the kids, no matter the situation, for a full week or perhaps I was honestly happy to have a little parenting control back, even if only temporary.
Whatever it was, it made my vacation just a little sweeter – even if it turns out that B isn’t so sweet!
Welcome back!
My kids’ daycare is closed this week so I get to do all that stuff too. But I also got to play in the little inflatable pool with them this afternoon and that’s well worth all the poopy diapers in the world. (Well, maybe not the world… that’d be a lot of diapers.)
Yes. YES I get this. So much.
One of my favorite parts of time off is GETTING to deal with lunches and naps and yes, even the crying. GETTING to be the one to soothe (or discipline, depending on the situation) is a reward that I think is uniquely cherished by women who work outside of the home.
Lindsey – your perspective struck me deeply. You see, I’m a work-at-home mom. I own an internet business and feel very fortunate to be home with my kids while still being able to use that part of my brain…you know, the creative part that comes alive when working?
But there are times when it’s all so overwhelming. When the kids fight, scream and pull at my leg while all I want is a moment of peace and time to myself. And then I think “how am I going to do this again with another baby”.
But while I sit here feeling baby Dash moving inside of me – watching my Nick and Zane playing nicely together on the floor – as I check blogs and twitter I feel quite blessed. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now.
Being a Mom is such a balancing act no matter where we work isn’t it? Finding enough time to fill the void left when the kids aren’t around while also finding enough time for you. My hats off to you working Moms. I did it for about 6 months when my 4 year old was a tiny baby and it felt like a lifetime…
Anyway, thanks for this reminder that I should soak up every moment I get with my boys. One day they’ll be in school 8 hours a day and then will move away to start their own lives.
Nell